Career Center Blog

October 5, 2009

Love in the time of corporate cutbacks


NWjobs

I was going to be predictable and write about dating in the workplace sometime around February 14. But since everyone's talking about David Letterman's office dalliances now, why wait?

It's no secret that being bed buddies with the boss can cause all sorts of workplace friction (the unwanted kind, that is). Coworkers might cry favoritism. Management might question the ethics of the happy couple. Eventually, tears, awkwardness, and pink slips could ensue.

But let's face it: A significant portion of the population dates their coworkers. A CareerBuilder survey of 8,000 U.S. employees conducted this year found that 40 percent of them had done so. What's more, 31 percent of those polled went on to marry their office paramour.

We're not just talking about dating one's teammates. Of those CareerBuilder polled, 42 percent got busy with their boss, with women dating up the corporate food chain quite a bit more than men.

Given how much time we spend at work, crushes, lust, and romance are bound happen. To lessen your chances of painful personal or political or repercussions, Forbes.com suggests dating outside your department.

As someone who's currently dating a guy from another department I met a decade ago (back when I worked in an office), I've found this a pretty innocuous way to go. Of course, my friend Marcie would probably beg to differ. Several years ago, she endured a nasty workplace breakup with a guy who worked on another floor. Each time she'd run into him in the lunchroom or elevator, she contemplated quitting her job.

But back to boldly going where your colleagues have not gone before -- with your boss. If you and your superior (or underling) can't keep your hands off each other and workplace dating isn't against company policy, Forbes.com recommends drawing up a "cupid contract" -- something that says you're both consenting adults and well aware of the company's sexual harassment policies. Forbes.com even suggests that the senior employer in the relationship let HR in on this bit of romantic news and offer to "take the hit if the company decides the pair should no longer work together."

Most of the people I know who've dated up or down the office hierarchy have done their best to keep their liaison under wraps. Given the high unemployment rate, I can't see any lovesick managers offering themselves on a silver platter for all of HR to judge. But if anyone's signed such an office romance prenup or gone on record with HR, I'd love to hear about it.

I'd also love to hear about your general experiences with love among the cubicles, whether you were the object of affection or a coworker was. How did your office romance turn out? How about those of your coworkers? Has an office romance affected your team or department in some positive or negative way? Do tell.

Michelle Goodman is the author of "My So-Called Freelance Life" and "The Anti 9-to-5 Guide." E-mail Michelle at mgoodman@nwjobs.com

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Randy Woods Randy Woods writes about job-search tools, networking techniques and other tips to help you land your dream job.

Matt Youngquist Matt Youngquist based in Bellevue, is a recognized expert in career coaching, job hunting and professional networking.

Natalie Singer Natalie Singer is a Seattle writer who covers workplace issues, work/life balance and self-employment.

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Michelle Goodman is the author of "My So-Called Freelance Life" and "The Anti 9-to-5 Guide."

Paul Anderson helps professionals in transition find their desired employment.

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